A Joyful Tribute to My Friend

by Grace Anderson

From the Editor: I don’t think there can be any higher tribute than someone who thinks back on your life and their first reaction is to realize the positive way in which you have been a part of theirs. Grace Anderson is the secretary of the National Federation of the Blind of Alabama, a position she never could have envisioned holding before she met with someone who was able to recognize and then cultivate leadership of a kind that Grace never thought possible. Here’s what she has to say about her dearly departed friend Joy Harris:

The definition of joy is a feeling of great pleasure and happiness. That's what my friend Joy Harris brought to me and to so many others with whom she came in contact. She never met a stranger. Joy had a way of seeing leadership potential in blind people even if they couldn't see it in themselves. This is certainly true for me and my story.

I first met Joy in October of 2014. I had recently moved to Alabama from a small city in Northwest Georgia and was having trouble adjusting to my new surroundings in a metropolitan city. Though I didn't realize it at the time, I was also lacking confidence in myself as a blind person. I was extremely shy. Joy would often say to me, "Speak up Grace, they've got to hear you, speak up." All that changed the more time I spent with Joy. She helped me find my voice and realize what I had to say mattered. I wouldn't be the woman I am today without her influence. I also wouldn't be in the Federation had she not introduced me to it.

Joy taught me so much in the eight years I knew her, not only about the Federation but life as well. Throughout the years I knew her, she battled cancer and was on and off chemo. Even on her worst days, she never complained. When I asked her how she was, she would often say, "I'm fine. Don't worry." At times, I would push further and ask, "Are you sure? You know you can tell me if you're not." Then she would say, “I'm just tired” or “I'm a little sore.”

Joy always put the needs of others before her own. I can recall the many weekends I would spend with her at her home. In the days leading up to my visit, she would always ask me to send a list of snacks I would like to have while there. I would tell her, "Don't worry about me; whatever you have will be fine." However she would always insist on me sending the list. So I did what I was told.

During the last few years of her life she would often have to rest more and be in her bed the majority of my visits. She would often say, "I'm sorry. I know this weekend hasn't been very fun for you with me having to lay around a lot.” I would tell her I was having a great time, and I wouldn't want to spend the weekend any other way. I cherished each weekend I got to spend with her. If she wasn't up to sitting in the living room, I would just hang out with her at her bedside and tell her the latest news of what was going on with work, family, and the NFB board meetings. If I didn't have anything exciting to tell her, we would just make up stories.

Joy loved the Federation with all her heart. So much was this so that she told me if her memorial service fell on a day of an NFB event, I better be at the NFB event (luckily there was not an event the day of her service).

Joy's dedication and leadership in the Federation were very refreshing to me and something I'd never seen before. She possessed two leadership qualities that you usually don't see together. She knew thoroughly how to support someone in a major leadership role, and if there wasn't anyone willing to step up to the plate, she'd do it herself even though she preferred to be "the behind the scenes girl."

She served as president of our Alabama affiliate from 2011 to 2018. During that time she invested her time making our Alabama affiliate better. Prior to her stepping into this role, she noticed there was a lack of unity and leadership in the affiliate, and she was determined to do something about it, and do something about it she did. During her years as president, the Alabama affiliate became unified. She was never afraid to share her opinion, whether it be good or bad. However, she would do it in a way that was respectful. She possessed the perfect balance of knowing when to crack the whip and when to show the softer, gentler side of herself.

When she was presented the Jacobus tenBroek award at the banquet during the 2018 Convention, she was rendered almost speechless. Rarely have I seen Joy speechless. This lady had a very distinctive voice and loved to talk. She didn't need a microphone to get her point across.
Joy was often making what she referred to as "good trouble," and made it her mission to teach me how to make good trouble as well. She would always tell me, "Grace, you have to pick your battles." And pick my battles I have. When I was in the midst of a battle, who was right there to lend a helping hand and lend a listening ear for my venting? Joy. She helped me persevere and surmount any obstacle I faced. When I felt like giving up, she would say, "You got this; I believe in you," and if that didn't convince me, she'd pull out her secret weapon and tell me, "Do it for me, Grace. Just do it for me." How could I say no to that?

I feel Joy not only prepared me to be a leader in the Federation, she also taught me how to continue the work of the Federation when she was no longer around for me to call upon. I recall one day I was at her house for a weekend visit, and she did what she did best and provided me with some encouragement about how to overcome my latest obstacle. I told her, "Joy, I don't know what I would do without you, and how am I ever going to go to a national convention knowing you won't be there to go with me?"

Her response was, "You will be fine," and "You are going to national convention."

When the day finally came and I heard Joy had passed, my heart was broken. I had planned to come visit her four days later. Instead, I was attending her visitation and memorial service. In the days leading up to her service, I was overwhelmed with the outpouring of love I received from my Federation family. The phone calls and text messages I received reminded me I was not alone, and I had a whole bunch of family standing ready to lift me up and do whatever they could to help me. All I had to do was call upon them. I am forever grateful to have each and every one of you, my dear Federation family members.

Our 2023 Convention in Houston, Texas, will be the first national convention I attend without my friend Joy at my side. While there are days I think how am I ever going to get through convention without her, what keeps me going and will help carry me through is the promise I made to Joy during my last weekend visit in February of 2022. I promised her I would continue to carry the torch and positively affect the lives of blind people I come in contact with as she has done for me and countless others.

In closing I would like to say that not a day goes by that I don't think about and miss my friend, but the memories we shared and the impact she made in my life as well as the lives of so many others will carry me through.

Joy's final words during her banquet speech when receiving her Jacobus tenBroek award were, "I dearly love the Federation, and as long as I'm here, I'll be with my Federation family and will always answer when called upon." I am proud to say she did just that. May we all take this page out of Joy's book and stay true to the Federation no matter what trials may come.