A Dream Come True
A Dream Come True
Vicky Chapman
From Discrimination to a Dream Come True
by Vicky Chapman
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From the Editor: The following article first appeared in the
Spring, 1999, edition of the NFB Vigilant, a publication of the
NFB of Virginia.
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A timid seven-year-old slowly walked into a small dance
studio which appeared very large to the little girl. The child
was in awe at how large the room was, and she wondered who the
other little girl was who faced her and copied all her movements.
She could see shapes, figures, and colors. She could not see
faces or recognize expressions. Watching the dance instructor,
the little girl tried to mimic her steps. Realizing that the
child wasn't following her movements, the teacher provided oral
instructions to guide the child's feet through the shuffle-toe-
heel dance steps.
After three years of tap dancing classes, the little girl
recognized her love for music and asked her parents if she could
take piano lessons. She had seen Rodgers and Hammerstein musicals
put on by the local high school and had dreams of singing and
dancing on stage. Musical training was a must for performing in
musicals. Although her parents realized the extent of her
blindness, they did not want it to discourage their daughter from
doing what she wanted to do. They bought a piano; then they began
an extensive search for a piano teacher. The search became a
drudgery after three piano teachers refused to instruct the
little girl. The mother finally took the child to one of the best
piano teachers in the small town of Hartsville. Miss Salleby, the
piano teacher, asked the child to sit on the bench in front of
the piano. The room was dark, and a small light shone over the
sheet music.
Fearful of the dark room, the child slowly walked over to
the piano bench, sat down, and faced the sheet music. Miss
Salleby asked the child how many lines and spaces were in one
row. Leaning over the piano keys, with her nose touching the
sheet music, the child attempted to count the lines and spaces.
Immediately, before the child could announce her findings, the
teacher turned to the child's mother and announced, "I can't
teach a blind child how to play the piano."
The child wanted to scream, "I am not blind. Just give me a
chance to learn how to play by ear." Without knowing how she got
out of the woman's house, the child was in her mother's car
riding home. There was a big lump in her throat, and the child
wanted to cry. She wanted to be held in her mother's arms and be
comforted. She wanted to know that she would be given another
chance for her dream to come true.
That event was never again mentioned in front of the child,
and the word "blind" was never again used in front of her until
she reached college. The child would not touch the piano when her
parents were home. She would sneak into the living room and teach
herself hymns, first playing the melody line and then trying to
play the chords with her left hand. If a member of the family
caught her trying to play, she would shut the piano lid and go to
her room.
Looking back through the images of my childhood memories, I
still find myself a bit tearful. There are so many types of
discrimination in this world, but I do believe that denying a
child the opportunity to learn and expand on her talents is a
travesty. "Where there is a will, there is a way," is a true
statement that applies to my life.
Considering the stumbling blocks I have encountered with my
music avocation, it is hard to believe that I am a part of the
Roanoke Opera Chorus. Throughout my high school and college
careers, I participated in the concert chorus. Listening and
reviewing recordings from rehearsals was the way I memorized
music. Instructors discouraged me from trying out for musical
roles from a fear that I would have difficulty moving around on
stage.
While in college I attempted a degree in music therapy. I
was not allowed to use a reader for theory classes, and the
instructor refused to read aloud what he had written on the
board. Although I was passing my music therapy classes, I found
myself exhausted from fighting with instructors and trying to
obtain the assistance I needed in order to learn. I was taking
voice and piano instruction, and the piano teacher would enlarge
my music. Finally, when a theory instructor assigned a fugue to
be analyzed using a graph, the difficulty I would have completing
the assignment on my own became obvious. When confronting the
instructor with my dilemma, he immediately informed me that the
task had to be completed independently, with no assistance. The
instructor clearly stated that if the assignment could not be
completed on my own, I had no business in a music program. I
dropped out of the program and completed my degree in early
childhood education.
For several years I tried to run away from music. After
completing my bachelor's degree, the prospect of facing the world
of work haunted me. Denial of my blindness resulted in fear about
how to perform the duties of a job.
Realizing my problem, my best friend encouraged me to move
to Nebraska to attend the Nebraska Center for the Visually
Impaired. Taking on the challenge, I attended the Nebraska
Rehabilitation Center. I wore sleep shades from eight to five,
five days a week; and I was told that I must use, not just take,
the long white cane everywhere I went during training. One of the
most difficult tasks for me was facing my fear of blindness. I
had to talk about my fears, frustrations, and dreams. One of the
instructors constantly reminded me that I should be on stage
singing and acting. Performing was difficult for me to approach
because I was convinced this was a dream that would never come
true. Through the excellent training I received at the Nebraska
Orientation Center, I gained confidence and belief in my
abilities as a blind person. I was no longer ashamed of my
blindness. It was time for me to apply the skills I had learned
to my life.
Professionally, my life blossomed in the field of
rehabilitation. As a recipient of various grants and scholarships
I was able to earn a master's degree in rehabilitation counseling
from Michigan State University. I tried continually to move away
from music but was constantly encouraged by friends to sing in
various church choirs. My dream continued to haunt me, and I
found it difficult to hold my tears back when attending a
performance. It wasn't fair; I wanted to be one of the performers
on stage. Testing the waters, I slowly began participating in
church choirs and even sang one semester with the Michigan State
concert choir. That vessel that had been empty for so long
finally started to be filled.
After moving to Anchorage, Alaska, I joined the community
chorus, one hundred and sixty voices strong. Despite being the
type of person who is neither religious nor superstitious, I have
to admit that I do believe that an angel came into my life by the
name of Kathy. Kathy lived in my neighborhood and gave me rides
home from choral rehearsal. After hearing me sing, Kathy
encouraged and nudged me to become more active in music. The
Anchorage Community Theater was having a call for people to try
out for The Sound of Music. Kathy talked to the director and had
a couple of pages enlarged that I would have to read for tryout.
Naturally, I memorized the two pages, prepared a song, held my
breath, and showed up for tryouts. To my surprise, I was offered
and accepted the role of Sister Sophia. Interesting note: when I
was a little girl, my grandmother would ask me what I wanted to
be when I grew up. Smiling and very serious, I would reply, a
nun. The director was not concerned about my blindness but was
concerned that I would be off crutches by the time of the
performances. While I had been skiing, an unfortunate accident
had left me with a torn anterior cruciate ligament.
One could say that my dream came true. After the completion
of the musical, the chorus director of the Anchorage Opera
Company encouraged me to try out for a part in the chorus. Again,
mustering up my courage, I dusted off some old voice
instructional books and auditioned. Now, looking back, it is hard
to decide which was most difficult: auditioning in front of a New
York director or performing on a sloped stage which was very
slippery. La Traviata was my first opera. I never dreamed of
being dressed in such elegant costumes and performing on such a
grand stage.
When I moved to Roanoke, Virginia, finally I knew in which
community activities I wanted to participate. Within my first
month of moving to the Star City I auditioned for the Roanoke
Symphony Chorus. Seven months later I was standing in a gym at
the Jefferson Center auditioning for a part with the Roanoke
Opera Chorus. Again I was shaking as I walked toward the piano,
proudly using my cane. I turned and faced the director, Craig
Fields, and nodded to my accompanist to begin. When I had sung
the last note, I waited anxiously for a response. It felt as if I
were waiting an eternity. Finally I mustered the courage to
inquire about Mr. Field's opinion of my audition. To my relief
the director informed me that I was in the chorus. My heart
soared, and immediately I realized that Mr. Fields had not asked
me any questions concerning how I would learn my music or move
around on stage. Again curiosity got the better of me, and I
asked Mr. Fields if he had any questions about my blindness. His
response was "no." To my relief, Craig informed me that he had
worked with several blind people over the years as a vocal
instructor and choral director.
As of now I have performed in four operas with the Roanoke
Opera. The chorus members are like a small family. We work
together to help each other learn parts, act, and move around on
stage. My fellow chorus members know that I will ask for help
when I need it and are more than willing to assist me. Craig has
indicated that he is amazed at the way I move around on stage. I
have to admit that I have failed to tell him how many times I
have run into props back stage. Seriously, my tenacity on stage
comes from my desire and belief in myself and Craig's belief in
my abilities. Yes, there are times when I am afraid that I may
miss a movement or a musical cue, or sing the wrong note. These
are fears that any actor has and mistakes that any actor can
make.
I may never be on Broadway, but that doesn't matter.
Remember that my dream was to be on stage and perform. That dream
has come true. It has been a struggle, but hopefully one that
will pave the way for others who are blind. Everywhere we go we
are setting examples that others can observe, learn from, and
follow. When we are willing to follow our dreams, discrimination
can result in a dream come true.
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